360和騰訊的網(wǎng)絡(luò)大戰(zhàn)爆發(fā)后,網(wǎng)友調(diào)侃騰訊致用戶信——“我們剛剛做出了一個(gè)艱難的決定……”編寫(xiě)了許多小段子發(fā)泄憤怒。
Here is Tencent's original open letter:
When you see this letter, we have just made a difficult decision. Before Qihoo360 stops infringing upon and slandering QQ, we have decided to stop running QQ on computers installed with 360's software。
騰訊公開(kāi)信原文:
當(dāng)您看到這封信的時(shí)候,我們剛剛作出了一個(gè)非常艱難的決定。在360公司停止對(duì)QQ進(jìn)行外掛侵犯和惡意詆毀之前,我們決定將在裝有360軟件的電腦上停止運(yùn)行QQ軟件。
Here are some jokes from netizens:
Microsoft:
When you see this letter, we have just made a difficult decision. Because two Chinese programs have severely affected our Windows services, until you stop using 360 and QQ, we have decided to suspend the operation of Windows in China。
微軟:
當(dāng)您看到這封信的時(shí)候,我們剛剛作出了一個(gè)非常非常非常非常艱難的決定,由于中國(guó)兩家互聯(lián)網(wǎng)公司的兩款軟件嚴(yán)重的干擾了我們的windows服務(wù)。在您停止使用360和QQ之前,我們決定暫停所有大中華區(qū)的windows服務(wù)。
NOKIA
We have just made a difficult decision. If our mobile phones detect an iPhone within 10 meters, they will automatically explode。
諾基亞
我們剛剛作出了一個(gè)非常非常非常非常艱難的決定。如果監(jiān)測(cè)到十米以內(nèi)有iPhone手機(jī),我們的手機(jī)將自動(dòng)引爆。
Master Kong
We have just made a difficult decision. If we found you have eaten another type of instant noodle, our products will be sold to you without flavouring。
康師傅
我們剛剛作出了一個(gè)非常非常非常非常艱難的決定。如果我們監(jiān)測(cè)檢測(cè)到您之前食用過(guò)其它品牌的方便面,您購(gòu)買(mǎi)的方便面內(nèi)將不配調(diào)料。
Baidu
We have just made a difficult decision. If we detect that you have visited Google, your Baidu ID will be automatically blocked。
百度
我們剛剛作出了一個(gè)非常非常非常非常艱難的決定。如果我們檢測(cè)到您之前訪問(wèn)過(guò)谷歌,您的百度賬號(hào)將被自動(dòng)屏蔽。